


I'm The Man

by greengirl82



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Caught, F/M, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Nudity, Teasing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-20
Updated: 2012-06-20
Packaged: 2017-11-08 04:09:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/438984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greengirl82/pseuds/greengirl82
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Emily loves teasing her friends, but what happens when her teasing goes a little too far and she has to fix this...</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm The Man

"Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit." E.E. Cummings

 

Emily stood in the break room with her two favorite girls, each chuckling at the behavior of someone who they assumed would always be unflappable. His movements in the bullpen, were beyond hilarious to them.

"Look at him" Garcia chuckled leaning against the counter, grinning, "If he wasn't so cute, he'd be adorkably clueless."

"Adorkably?" Emily asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Its a word" Garcia said emphatically, "Believe me, Gumdrop. I make them up as they come along."

"You didn't make that up" JJ countered with a raised eyebrow, "You saw that, on that new tv show..." the blonde frowned, "You know the one with that girl... her sister's on that show with that guy from the vampire show..."

"Vampire show?" Garcia asked, "True Blood? Vampire Diaries? Moonlight?"

"Now that guy was really hot" Emily agreed, "But I don't think that's the show she means."

"She's talking about Angel, lamb chop" Kevin said with a smile, seeing the three women stare at him in surprise, "What? My sister like the other show with the blonde vampire slayer." seeing that they didn't believe him, "Shut up."

"Aw, my Kevy-kins was a Buffy nerd." Garcia grinned, "Now I can die a happy woman."

Rolling her dark eyes, "Getting back to the topic at hand." Emily frowned, "The New Girl."

"What new girl?" Garcia asked turning her attention to the brunette, "Oh the show. Yeah, ok I stole it. Jealous?"

Emily and JJ rolled their eyes, "Whatever." noticing something was off in the bullpen, "Ladies take a look at that."

The three women turn their attention to the nervous man in the bullpen, each shocked by the demeanor of their male friend. And what they saw made them burst out laughing, as they wandered out into the bullpen watching him.

"My Chocolate Love God" Garcia said, amused, "What are you doing?"

Morgan and the equally embarrassed Reid turn their attention to the three women and silent Kevin.

"I, uh..." Morgan sputtered, here he was one of the most revered profilers, flustered at the sight of three female BAU colleagues, "Well the thing is..."

"Yes?" JJ asked with a grin, she was glad for once not to be on the receiving end of the teasing, narrowing her blue eyes, "You've got a date?"

That perked Emily and Garcia up, while Reid looked away trying to maintain composure.

"You've got a date?" Emily asked, "Where are you taking her?"

"Well we're going to..." Morgan started only to be cut off.

"Whats her name?" Garcia demanded, setting down on the desk by the flustered agent, "What's she do? Ooh, what color is her hair?"

"What?" Morgan asked overwhelmed by the pelting of questions, "Her name is Tracy, she's a banker and she's a brunette."

"Mm" Emily said, "Brunette?"

Narrowing his eyes, "No, Princess, she's not a carbon copy of you. You're just going to have to deal with my undying affections on you, not some other replica."

Garcia chuckled, then pouted, "Well what about me?"

"Baby girl, don't you three fine mamas know you're my one and onlys?" Morgan grinned, "Including you, Jelly Bean."

"Jelly bean?" JJ asked with a raised eyebrow.

Shrugging, "Trying something new?" Morgan offered the brunette, "I thought the bullpen was clear and Reid here was offering to..."

The three women noticed how he got quiet at the last part, leaning in, Emily said, "What's that sonny boy? I didn't bring my Miracle Ear hearing aid you're gonna have to speak louder."

"He's helping me..." Morgan repeated again, then whispered the last part.

"What?" the three frustrated women asked again.

A door opened behind them, "He was teaching him how to waltz."

The team looked up and saw an amused Dave and Hotch watching them interrogate the so-called playboy of the group.

"Waltz?" Emily asked, "Why didn't you ask me? I mean I practically grew up attending every function known to man."

"Well I suggested that, but he thought it'd be too much asking you since you hated the social scene." Reid explained, "He said he'd asked the walking brain."

Raising an eyebrow, "Morgan, you could of just asked. I wouldn't have minded."

"Sorry, Princess" Morgan started, then gave her a smirk, "Say, Em..."

"Nope." Emily replied moving to her desk, "I've got a date and you should of asked earlier."

"You've got a date?" JJ asked with a grin, looking over at the men, "With who?"

"Whom" Emily corrected watching her female friends roll their eyes, "And that's all I'm saying."

Both blondes fumed at that, while Morgan chuckled having the spotlight off him and his nervousness.

As he walked out, he heard Emily throw out one last retort as he headed off for the locker room, "Try not to blow your load before you even begin."

That stopped him in his track, hearing that comment. Every man's worst nightmare and there she was along with JJ and Garcia laughing at him.

He knew she meant in a fun, teasing manner that he normally would have laughed at, if he wasn't on the receiving end of it.

Garcia chuckled when she saw his shoulder tense and hung his head, "Whoa, ho ho. Come on, Chocolate God we're teasing."

"Garcia" Hotch said warningly, both he and Dave felt for the athletic profiler, "Knock it off."

As Morgan made his way out of the bullpen he heard one of the three women, "Hey, Morgan come on back here."

He opened up the men's locker room door, pondering if he should cancel his date. He felt nervous enough as it was before the teasing, now he was downright terrified.

Walking over to his locker, he grabbed his change of clothes, and saw his radio. He knew the one thing that would make him feel better at that moment. 

"Well, well, well" Dave's voice rang out over the catwalk, as the two men wandered down to the three guilty looking women, "I've got to say I've never thought I'd say this about any of you; but you have no idea how mean or nasty that just was."

"But it was a joke" Garcia protested, waving off their disappointment, "Besides my Chocolate Love and I say way dirtier things then that. Right, Kevy?"

"Unfortunately, that is true." Kevin replied, but leaned back against a desk, "But that was a low blow, even for you Penelope."

Her mouth dropping, "But I didn't say it."

"No but you laughed right along with her" Hotch replied, nodding in Emily's direction, then turned to JJ, "And you did nothing either. You know standing around and teasing is a form of bullying and I thought you three were against that."

Shaking her head, "It was an honest to goodness joke, Hotch." Emily defended, "What do you want me to do, go and apologize?"

"Yes." Hotch, Dave and Reid said in unison.

Rolling her eyes, "Fine, I'll go and do my good deed for the day." turning on her heel, "Guess I can always break for animals tomorrow."

Hotch looked over at Dave, "Too hard?"

"Not hard enough." Dave replied looking at the two blondes, "Got anything to add, blondies?"

"Nope." Garcia said wandering over to a free desk to work.

"We're good." JJ replied, going to Emily's desk to help out on the case files.

Marching down the hall, Emily silently cursed the very man that she had to go and apologize to. How was she suppose to know he'd be so sensitive towards her comments?

Shrugging she frowned when she thought she heard country music. 'Is that Kenny Chesney?'

Lightly pushing open the locker room door, she paused hearing Morgan singing along with the country song.

"She thinks my tractor's sexy, it really turns her on" his deep voice sang out, "She's always staring at me, while I'm chugging on..."

Both Emily and Morgan weren't prepared for the sight of each other.

"What are you doing in here?" Morgan shouted in surprise covering himself up, while she gave a nervous laugh.

"God I'm sorry." Emily said slamming the door after she left, "So sorry."

Morgan's head hung, hearing the laughter, "Oh my God." 

Emily stormed into the bullpen, marching to her desk and dropping her head on her desk.

"That wasn't long" Garcia said, pulling her chair up next to Emily, who started laughing, "What?"

"Oh my God" Emily said lifting her head, while Hotch and Dave turned around staring at the uncontrollable woman, "I'm done."

"What?" Dave asked, "What's so funny? What are you laughing at?"

JJ wandered over, "What's wrong with you?"

"I saw Morgan" Emily told the girls, while Hotch and Dave tried to appear not to eavesdrop.

"Saw Morgan do what?" JJ asked confused.

Taking a deep breath, she turned in her desk chair to stare at them, "Something happened, which was a total accident by the way. I might as well be totally honest about it."

"What?" Garcia asked.

"I walked into the men's locker room" Emily started, "I heard some music playing and walked in on Morgan."

"Walked in on Morgan doing what?" Hotch asked intrigued.

Garcia laughed, "Wait was he dancing around to the music?"

Nodding, "Well yeah that's part of it."

JJ rolled her eyes, "So what was he listening to? Some Rhianna? Janet Jackson? Oh wait let me guess, Lady Gaga?"

"Kenny Chesney's She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy." Emily answered, watching the team laugh, even Reid.

"Oh God, thanks" Garcia tried catching her breath, "I needed the laugh."

"That wasn't the worst part" Emily told them, "He was naked."

"What?" Hotch and Dave shouted.

"You saw Morgan naked?" JJ asked, watching the brunette nod in agreement.

"What did he look..." Garcia started only to see the man in question come in, nod to the men and walked quietly up to his office.

"Wow, that was uncomfortable" JJ commented turning to Emily, "Look it'll be difficult at first but it will get easier. Just let things settle down."

Both Hotch and Dave silently went to their offices, both men paused when Emily added, "I laughed when I saw it."

"What?" Garcia shrieked, "Why?"

"It was a nervous thing," Emily told her, "I didn't do it because he wasn't well..."

"Endowed" Garcia finished, "Well you know how have to make this up to him, right?"

"I know." Emily paused, contemplating how to make this up to him. 

Morgan stormed into the bullpen the next morning. Embarrassed at last nights events.

"So how goes the date?" Garcia asked watching the man march up the catwalk silent, "That bad huh?"

"It never even got started." Morgan told her, "Every time I started with her..."

"You heard Emily's laughter in your head" Dave finished standing on the catwalk next to Morgan's office.

Morgan winced, hearing that feminine laughter from one of his close friends, practically his best friend. Who just happened to be a woman, it felt like she was emasculating him.

He had stood there stunned, naked in front of her. That alone was embarrassing, not to mention the fact that he was singing along to a country song but add in the fact that her eyes shot down to his 'friend' and he just wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

"Morgan" Hotch said, causing the younger man to turn to his team leader, "I happen to know for a fact that she wasn't laughing at that."

Morgan rolled his dark eyes, "What? She has a nervous laughter that only happens when she sees naked people?"

"Yes" Both Hotch and Dave commented, looking at each other surprised by the other's admission.

Morgan narrowed his eyes at them, "Is there something that I'm missing?"

"No" Hotch quickly replied, muttering to himself as Morgan opened his office door.

"Surprise!" Emily shouted stunning the three men, "Shit."

All three male eyes, watched in glee as Emily grabbed her trench coat and quickly cover herself.

Morgan heard Hotch clear his throat behind him, "Not that I'm not glad for the surprise, Princess, but would you like to tell me why you're naked in my office?"

"Uh, to make us even?" Emily offered, groaning as she closed her eyes, "Just how much did you all see?"

Dave chuckled, "More then enough to know you've got a tattoo on your hip. "

"Damn it" Emily muttered, "This was suppose to be for Morgan's eyes to make us even."

"Well looks like we got a free show too." Hotch's voice said dryly but there was a smirk on his face, "Now how about you go get dressed before I have to write you up for violating the dress code?"

"What dress code?" Morgan chuckled, "Nothing more fine, then a fine naked woman in my office."

"Watch it" Emily warned walking past the men, "Otherwise when Garcia decides to grill me on your size, I might just give her some false information..."

As the brunette agent turned to go down the catwalk, "Same goes for you Hotch and Dave."

Morgan whirled around, "She saw you both naked too? When?"

Hotch sighed watching Dave give him a look, "Well, Aaron?"

"When she came by to help me after Foyet's attack, she helped me... in the shower." Hotch said quickly, "It was all quite innocent."

"Rossi?" Morgan asked.

"After the cook out at my apartment" Dave told the two men, "She stayed behind to help me clean up but we ended up having a food fight and well, I forgot to bring a towel. She brought one in."

Morgan paused, "She's seen us all naked."

"Well except for Reid." Hotch pointed out with a chuckle, "Can you imagine how he'd react to that?"

The three men looked down into the bullpen, Reid looking up as Emily brought him a pen. Leaning down she whispered something in his ear, and they wondered why Reid turned bright red.

"You don't think..." Morgan asked looking over at the other two men, "That she's saw him too?"

"Wouldn't put it past her." Dave commented, shrugging his shoulders as he wandered over to his office.

Hotch looked back down into bullpen before closing the door to his office, intrigued by the secretive side of his brunette agent.

 

"Self confidence gives you the freedom to make mistakes and cope with failure without feeling your world has come to an end or that you are a worthless person." Author Unknown


End file.
